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I find that words like 'slag" and "slut" not only don't support all of those healthy, accepting attitudes that really leave room for all of us to not be the same person, but that they really undermine that.Let's set aside the more judgy, mean spritied implications or common uses of all those sl words (slut, slag, slattern, slapper, etc.) and see if we can't get to the heart of what you might mean when you use one of those words to talk about how you feel right now. When people say they're feeling like one of those things, usually what they're trying to express is that they feel like they have been judged by others as a less valuable person because of their sexual choices; that their sexual choices have left them feeling less valuable or valued, by themselves or others.If you feel like that, that can be a useful feeling to identify to help you make choices you feel better about in the future, but it's going to be less useful if you come at it from a judgy, self loathing place, rather than approaching it with the given that you, like everyone else, are just as valuable a person after any sexual experiences as you were before them.I really don't see any evidence, historically or currently, to show that people feeling like crap about themselves helps them make their own best choices and lead their happiest, healthiest lives, whether that's about sex or anything else. In fact, when it comes to sex and history, we know that people feeling ashamed and guilty has only tended to make matters worse, and made it harder for people to envision, create and live happy, healthy sex lives that suit them best.
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